The Hypnotist

29 Aug

My husband and I are fairly new to the city we live in. We made the long boring drive from Omaha, Nebraska to Lancaster, California just five short months ago. And aside from our forays to Los Angeles (an hour south) we don’t do much “hanging out” around the city we live in.

So when we heard about the Antelope County Fair blowing into town and had a chance to go we decided why the hell not? After all it couldn’t be worse than the Nebraska County Fair which is far from spectacular.

Um guys, it was FANTASTIC.

It wasn’t one of those fairs that was catered to children either, there were rides, live concerts (Miranda Lambert), mechanical bulls, turkey legs, free spin the wheel and win tropical vacations thingys, palm readers, and of course a hypnotist.

When we first arrived we weren’t really sure if it was going to be worth it, you had to pay 5$ to park a mile away (do you always have to pay to park here?!), and then you had to pay to get in! It was like some serious six-flag stuff. But the moment we emptied our wallets and were able to enter we knew it was worth it.

Immediately you can see there are a zillion things to do here and the smell the funnel cake wafting through the air wasnt bad either. Now not everything was great (old lady craft shows and some boring cooking tutorials) but we spent the first thirty minutes just walking around checking things out.

I’m one of those people who the second they go somewhere where there’s food, I’m hungry. So of course we had to eat. As we’re walking around checking out our food choices we notice a lonely mechanical bull just waiting to throw off its next innocent victim. So yes I made my husband ride it and yes I have pictures! And video! Now that’s ten dollars well spent.

So after eating and riding a few, not too crazy, rides we realize there’s a whole nother side to this fair thing! This side is more like the souvenir and random side shows side. And as we’re leisurely walking through it we see something magical. A full-blown hypnotist doing his thing on stage. I loved every second of it! We only caught the end of his act but the whole time you watch it you can’t help but think “is this real?”. At the end he announced he’ll be doing one more show for the night in an hour. Great, now we’ll get to see the whole thing!

My husband turns to me and says…….”I”m gonna do it.”

WHAT!!

Me: “You’re gonna go up there and get hypnotized?”

Him: “Yeah, I wanna see if it works”

Now my husband is a skeptic with the best of ’em, psychics, palm readers, dinosaurs (I know! I’ve told him about fossils but he’s not buying it), and especially hypnotists. I thought this was going to be extremely funny, so I was all for it. We had an hour to kill so we went to watch this old couple who was a few stages away singing their hearts out to a two person audience, who we felt bad for so decided to double their audience with our presence. Then got me an icee for the show and headed back to Mr. Hypnotist (his name was David something, or Craig? no idea).

Now we didn’t see the beginning of the show last time so we weren’t sure how this was going to go. Dave (I’ve decided to call the hypnotist this), a 40 something year old, rather dorky guy gets on his mic and says to his considerable sized audience that anyone who wants to be hypnotized this show has to run up on stage and be one of the first to claim a chair by sitting in it. 76 people take off toward the stage, my husband one of them. Now because he skips the stairs entirely and dives onto the stage he’s one of the first to claim a chair. Let the show begin!

I’d like to point out that my husband REALLY wanted this to work, like follow every instruction exactly to hopefully fall into hypnosis. I’d also like to point out that being hypnotized is at the top of my not if I can help it list for myself. Which is why for the first ten minutes I paid very little attention to Dave, in fear of accidentally being hypnotized while sitting in the audience.

Nothing special happened anyway. It was a lot of Dave telling them to “close your eyes and image…” in his loud voice, um I think I could have done that myself. Anywhoo after about ten minutes they were all supposedly “asleep”. The whole time I’m obviously only watching my husband, because he’s the only one I know and therefore the only one I’ll be able to tell if this thing is real or not by watching to see if he acts out of character. Plus he told me he wouldn’t fake anything.

The first few things they did still sitting with their eyes closed, driving a car, playing a musical instrument, some weird wrist turning thing, but you couldn’t tell if they were still just following his instructions or were really asleep doing these things. My husband opened his eyes a few times during this and would shrug his shoulders like “nothings happening”. He looked really tired though and almost as if he wasn’t remembering the time that lapsed in between his eye openings.

I couldn’t really tell if anyone was faking it or not. At one point they were supposed to be in a movie theater watching a really scary movie and everyone was very convincing as they screamed, even my husband. He said he wasn’t gonna fake anything either, so this must be real!

Next everyone was instructed to do a dance to whatever music comes on and “Baby Got Back” starts streaming out of the speakers, as everyone on stage starts shaking their asses. I’ve been laughing for about 20 minutes now because to me all of this is hilarious. Even if it is fake.

Because Dave considered this his late show with his “adult” crowd (two five-year olds sitting next to me) his next plan was to send out the people he’s hypnotized into the audience to give some lap dances. Oh God.

At the point when they’ve just reached the audience and the “dancers” start going at it my husband goes over to talk to Dave quietly behind the crowd of people. I stand up to see better and can just make out Dave helping my husband up off the floor. What’s happened? Then he leaves the group and comes walking over to me.

Me: What’s wrong?

Him: Nothing it’s stupid it didn’t work. Everyone’s faking it.

Me: But what about all the stuff you did? You said you weren’t gonna fake it.

Him: I didn’t wanna ruin his show.

Me: Why were you on the floor?

Him: He threw me on the floor and told me to SLEEEP!

Me: He threw you on the floor and told you to SLEEEP?! Do you remember everything?

Him: Yeah.

Me: What about the movie thing and driving the car?

Him: Yeah I remember all of it. It was stupid.

And after that we sat and watched the rest of the show together. I still watched with a careful eye trying to figure these people out. Was everyone faking it just to not ruin this guys show? Seems sorta extreme. But what do I know I’m too afraid to even attempt getting hypnotized.

The next day after giving up on at least this guy being a legit hypnotist and while smacking each other on the head and saying SLEEEP! This magic happened…

Me: I don’t know some of it was kinda convincing.

Him: No it wasn’t the girl next to me was talking the whole time.

Me: But what about when you guys were playing the instruments? The one girl playing at the end was really going to town on her cello.

Him: Instruments?

WHAT!?

Me: The instruments at the beginning, he told you guys you were in an orchestra band or something.

Him: I don’t remember that.

Me: No way! You were playing the violin!

Him: No I wasn’t.

Me: You don’t remember it?

Him: No. But I remember everything else.

So there you have it folks, hypnotists are REAL! He doesn’t remember the stuff from the beginning but distinctly remembers Dave talking too loud at some point, which I can only assume broke the hypnosis. I however will never agree to getting hypnotized and therefore instead of finding out for myself will just have to believe what my husband tells me, for once.

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One Response to “The Hypnotist”

  1. Cassandra Gimbel August 29, 2011 at 2:58 pm #

    Welcome to California!! Sorry to be the bearer(sp) of bad news. You have to pay to park EVERYWEAR in California! And it gets expensive. Go to a baseball game or some sports thing and you easily have to pay 30 or 40 bucks. I definitely dont miss that’

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