The Breakdown: Teen Mom Episode 2×10

9 Sep

I mostly watch “Teen Mom” because I’m fascinated with Catelynn and Tyler’s relationship. Where did they get all that maturity at 17? Plus Bentley is extra cute. This is a recap of the latest episode titled…”Stay With Me”.

This episode starts as always with a little tidbit about the trouble these girls have gotten themselves into this week.

Amber gets arrested and charged with domestic battery for beating up Gary like six months ago. This also means there is a no-contact order between Gary and Amber. Gary is heartbroken over this news which is sort of baffling to me. Um guy she bashed your head into a wall (he points out that this only happened a few times, he’s clearly the girl blaming herself for her abusive boyfriends actions in this scenario), she’s an unfit mother and you guys are broken up, why so down?

Did she bring her own jail house attire from home? Or did they make her put on that sweet outfit before picture time?

Farrah has decided to look into moving to Florida with Sophia. I’d like to know where she gets all this money? In the last two episodes she’s gone to California and Arizona just to check out places to live and as far as I can tell she has no job to speak of. Must be nice. I think her parents pay for everything which is unfortunate because she’s probably the most ungrateful person on the planet. Plus she makes this face at her mother a lot.

Yup that face.

Maci’s boyfriend Kyle gets into a dirt biking accident and shatters his knee. Maci feels overwhelmed with taking care of Bentley, her school work and now taking care of Kyle. But nothing new ever really happens with Maci except Bentley gets cuter and her ex Ryan comes up with something new to say proving how much of an idiot he really is.

See, so cute.

Catelynn is still in her Senior year of high school (cause having a baby when you’re 16 puts you back a year or so I guess) while Tyler is starting his first day of College. Tyler decides to go clubbing with his friends that weekend, and when he invites tells Cate he’s gonna go with or without her she proceeds to freak out. I really feel for her here because I totally understand being the kind of person who’s completely awkward in a club type situation and steers clear of dance floors at all costs. Before they can even really start to argue they decide to go to counseling to talk about the issue. WHO DOES THAT? Did I mention they were my favorite?

Farrah thinks that because her dog is small-ish she can put diapers on it. Actually the episode where she got the dog she brings it home and holds it over the toilet and tells it to pee. I don’t think she understands how dogs work. Diapers are way more expensive and a bigger hassle than just training the dog to pee outside in the first place. But that’s too hard for her to comprehend so she gives the dog to her old lady neighbor who I’m pretty sure didn’t understand Farrah wanted her to keep it forever and not to just babysit it.

For a second I thought it was also wearing shoes but that's just it's feet.

Remember when I said Farrah was ungrateful? This is what she said to her Dad when he comes over, in the most condescending of tones…”Hi Michael, thanks for knocking.” I’m surprised her parents aren’t happy she wants to move away.

Amber finds out she has to stay in jail for 24 hours. Gary decides for like the billionth time that he wants to work things out with her, I’m so over their relationship that I stopped listening to Gary after this.

Oh look Bentley got cuter!

Catelynn and Tyler go to see this therapist lady…

Not only is she kind of scary looking but that squatting fairy on her desk kinda freaks me out.

…who doesn’t really give them any solid advice, except that there’s a possibility that in the future they might decide they don’t wanna be together. I’m no therapist but shouldn’t she be telling them the opposite of that? I digress. They found her helpful nonetheless cause they head home to get ready for a night on the town! Where they end up having a great time and all of Catelynn’s preconceived fears about clubbing are put to rest.

Farrah decides Florida IS where she wants to move to, finally. I hope this works out for her considering Sophia is scared of the sand AND the ocean.

Apparently after a night in the slammer Amber has a whole new appreciation for life and the people in her life (I’ll believe it when I see it), so she decides to pick up around her house as a little celebration. Meanwhile Gary sits at home and cries all alone (they don’t actually show him crying but I’m sure it happened).

And one last time, Bentley is cute and Ryan says something that I’m sure was idiotic, but I wasn’t listening.

The End.

ROLL CREDITS.

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