Dollar Store-ies

14 Jan

This is the exact conversation I had with the cashier at the Dollar Store as she’s ringing me out…

Lady: (As she’s reading the wrapping of the candy I’m purchasing, because of course what else would I be buying at the Dollar Store) So it’s vanilla and then covered with chocolate?

It takes me a second to register she’s talking to me because I hate small talk and find it confusing when people take it upon themselves to drag me into this ridiculous cycle of exchanging meaningless words with strangers. So I just stare at her and then nod.

Lady: Mmm that sounds yummy.

What I should have said: Yes of course they’re yummy! Do you think I would have dragged my lazy self out of the house at 5pm when I just woke up a few hours ago for anything less than yummy!? Let’s not be ridiculous lady.

But instead I continued to stare at her and then reached for my wallet. As she’s waiting for me to resurface the depths of my purse with some money she starts caressing the heart-shaped Valentine’s Day balloons that are displayed right next to her.

Lady: We got these new balloons.

It was like the beginning of a sales pitch where she asks me if I’d like to purchase a balloon for a holiday that’s a month away, but she just stopped there.

I swipe my card and put in my pin at lightening speed, cause I’m a pro at paying debit. And she says this as she looks at the balloons.

Lady: They’re kind of an awkward shape though.

And she’s not wrong, they were obviously the batch of wrongly cut heart shapes that I’m sure crop up at dollar stores around the nation. But why was she telling me this? I barely uttered a word to her and she thinks I wanna hear about the awkward balloons?

I’m obviously the MOST fun person to ring out if you’re a cashier.

Have you ever been to one of those dollar stores where everything isn’t just a dollar? What’s up with those?

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